Music.
It's the thing thats kept me sane (along with photography) for the majority of my life. I was THAT kid who didn't have many friends growing up. The ones I did have though usually stabbed me in the back at one point or another. Music especially was my getaway when my grandfather passed away in 1990. After he had passed, I kind of ended up being detached from anything really emotional knowing that I would get fucked over at some point or another. So I delve my head, ears and heart into the arts. Music, Video Games (yes its art. I am not going to try and convince you other wise), movies, photography and books. These things were my friends. I even took a stab (unsuccessfully might I add) at writing. I tend to over use the word fuck. What can I say. It just rolls off fucking nicely off the fingers and the tongue! But those were my outlets for any emotion.
Guns N' Roses helped me cope with the loss of my grandfather (coma), and they were also the start of me listening to heavier music. Up to this point I was listening to bands like Tom Petty, Billy Joel, Billy Ocean and Richard Marx (don't judge!) So GNR was the gateway that i needed. From there it was game on. However some caveats were to be head. I had a few things going against me at that point in time from a music standpoint. MTV wasn't allowed. I was in catholic school when i got the heavy metal bug (see where I am going with this?) and I was an altar boy at the local church. I am really batting 100. While this genre of music was discouraged by the school AND my parents, neither of them really were hard on the genre as a whole. But growing up in the 80s/ early 90s (i was born in 79) as issue in music was taking the country by storm....Suicide.
I remember constantly being told (not so much from my parents although i did listen to quite a bit of stuff that pissed them off) don't listen to Judas Priest. Don't listen to AC/DC (this was The Razors Edge era) and especially don't listen to Ozzy Osbourne. These were "satanic" bands and you shouldn't listen to them. So for the longest time I didn't listen to any of them... Ozzy was the worst offender because of the Suicide Solution song and also the fact in a drunken state he bit the head off a fucking live bat (see i like the word fuck! Ozzy would approve..for the record).
They called him the Prince of Darkness.
To the outside world, Ozzy Osbourne was wild, chaotic, even dangerous. But to those of us who grew up under the weight of the world and found solace in the distortion and scream—he was something else entirely. Ozzy didn’t just sing about madness, pain, and survival—he embodied it, and somehow, made it feel like you could live through your own chaos too
The whole ozzy thing though started to change when I heard Close My Eyes forever (the duet with Lita Ford). After hearing the song, i obviously didn't die. I didn't feel suicidal. I was OK. I didn't hear much ozzy after that. I don't remember hearing too much airplay on the local station at the time Rock 107. his rival Alice Cooper was dominating the airwaves with his hit Poison. Which is a great song in its own right, But I still wasn't convinced that it was "safe" to listen to Ozzy. When you hear things over and over again, especially as a kid you tend to believe it because your the kid and they are the adults. Why would an adult lie?
I had a friend, Carl. met him in 92 maybe 93. With the exception from Close my eyes. I was pretty much listening to everything. Skid Row, Pearl Jam, Warrant, Dangerous Toys, GNR, Motley Crue the list goes on. Still no Ozzy. Anyways , Carl was a huge classic rock guy (i'm not sure if he still is) but he was big into Black Sabbath and Allman Brothers. Those were his big bands (keep in mind Carl was also a good 6-7 years older than I was so his music tastes were totally different from mine). Carl was a big music guy (thats how we became friends) and i seen Black Sabbath "master of reality) sitting on his cd player. He wanted me to borrow it, i remember asking him who the singer was, and he said Ozzy. Uh oh. So not to be rude i borrowed it like he wanted and ofcourse when i gave it back to him i gave him a line of shit saying i listened to it when i didn't (the brainwashing was real folks) So he then gave me the bark at the moon record because he didn't want it anymore. Well i didn't have a record player so it sat. I even acquired Speak of the Devil from a relative on vinyl...We already know why i didn't listen to that album. But the tide also started to change.
Ozzy was getting some major promotion for his album No More Tears. I don't recall the song that i heard...Maybe Road to Nowhere or or Time after Time. I don't think it was the title track or Mama i'm coming home. Again. Didn't die. Had no suicidal thoughts. Didn't want to hurt any animals or people. Maybe i was given a line of shit (we already know that answer) , So i got the No More Tears album (thank you columbia house!) and absolutley loved it. I then started going down his back catalog. The Ultimate Sin, Tribute, Bark at the moon. Diary of a madman and ofcourse Blizzard of Ozz and for the record, i did skip over Suicide Solution for the longest time because i didn't know what it was about and since thats where the issues started with him, i avoided it until i actually knew what it was about. There was no internet at that point or it was still in its really infant stages so it wasn't like i could get a hold of the lyrics easily. I think he had done an interview about it because he was being taken to court (even though it was almost a decade later since its release) Once i found out it was like an epiphany. This guy has been used for a scapegoat for anything bad that happens. It wasn't just a war on Ozzy, it was a war on heavy metal in particular.
The more i listened to ozzy the more i appreciated him. Like GNR, he had a soundtrack to my life. But they were like yin and yang. GNR, were songs about anger, depression ect... Ozzy on the other hand was about love and positivity. You can't deny it after listening to Crazy Train. Although i'm not gonna lie, The Ultimate Sin was a dark album just in general.
Then ofcourse after i really started getting into him he went into retirement #1. Grunge was taking over. Rock as we new it was changing. Then ozzy comes out of retirement and releases Ozzmosis. The Zakk Wylde influence wasn't really there and i love Old LA Tonight and ofcourse Perry Mason. A couple more albums followed. Then out come that mtv show The Osbournes.
Ozzy wasn't just a crazy musician. His home life was just as crazy too. You could watch an episode of The Osbournes and be like thats MY family.
You couldn't help but love the man. What you got from Ozzy was genuine. You don't get that alot. The fans loved him, and he loved us back. He was unapologetic about how much he loved the fans. He is literally the true definition of ICON. There will NEVER be another Ozzy. To be honest with you, unless its Ozzy himself, i don't care to see whomever takes his place upon that throne.
He shaped my world with the legends, the lies about him, the shananigans. I am even sure there's even stories we don't even know about yet. Maybe never will.. The world of rock n roll owes him (and black sabbath) a major debt
Ozzy was more than his stage persona. He was the rare kind of human who held darkness in one hand and still managed to shine light with the other. And in a world that often feels cold, cruel, and absurd—we need more Ozzy’s. People who are unfiltered. People who are loud and honest and loving, even when the world doesn't know what to make of them.
He made us laugh. He made us cry.
None of us want to say goodbye.
Rest in peace Ozzy. Thank you for everything
